One last play-through of Double Dragon before bed... and alas, I have once again been bested by the Double Dragon. All the way to the final boss, again, and dead. His name is Willy, and he has a fucking machine gun. From now it's clear what needs to be done. I need to go back to "the old school," whatever and wherever that may be, gather all my Double Dragon materials, and prepare myself for the final battle... Pull out my Double Dragon instruction manual, pour over every single word, every letter -- pour over it with fairy dust, pour it on the manual, rub the fairy dust in, then when every word has been gathered, take the fairy dust which is now magical Double Dragon fairy dust, and sprinkle it all over myself, all over my room, my console, the television, the controllers, the carpet, the walls... Everything will be Double Dragon, the Double Dragon will become me, and then and only then will I truly feel I'm ready to venture out into the wild streets, the wild streets where the plot of Double Dragon takes place, all my pores radiating Double Dragon fairy dust. Today I might have been bested, but tomorrow I will be best, as the great goddess almighty of the universe decrees it, hallowed be thy name, and the conquest of Double Dragon will be complete. Amen.